We hope you had an incredible weekend! In today’s Monday Minute we are talking about how to deal with that guy. You know who I’m talking about- they guy who thinks that your ice-breaker is the Super Bowl, the guy who yells at a Jr. High girl because she giggled during your message, the guy who thinks they know better than everyone else. In fact, you’re probably picturing someone right now… if you’re not, you might be that guy! Seriously though, that guy can ruin your ministry if you fail to deal with them.
I’m all for being competitive, but then again, you don’t want to wind up being the crazy Little League parent that screams and yells at 8-years-olds. In all seriousness, you have to guard against allowing these types of people into your ministry. While we need to develop and train young leaders who have potential, we must also guard our students from people who are potentially harmful, even if it is unknowingly.
Here’s a few quick tips in dealing with people like that:
1. Address the issue right away.
Many leaders believe that issues will simply go away over time. While that can be the case in rare occasions, it is not the norm. Most of the time, unaddressed problems with attitudes or behavior breed other, larger issues.
Make sure to have clear and concrete examples that are easy for the person to follow. Don’t attack. Take time to listen, but be firm. True love confronts the hard issues. Nothing is worse than sitting down with someone and coming away with no resolution.
2. Have clear solutions laid out.
Most people in life are great fault finders, but few are good at finding solutions. This is where you have to prepare. I suggest writing things down if you are a person who gets nervous in these situations. Run through the possible answers they may give in your mind so that you know how to answer. Also, make sure you listen to what they are saying beyond the immediate response- you may be dealing with someone who is hurt and simply looking for attention. If that’s the case, you may be dealing with an entirely new issue.
3. Do the right thing.
When it’s all said and done, you have been given the awesome responsibility as a leader to help shape and shepherd these students. Sometimes you have to suspend someone from ministry for a time and other times you may need to cut ties all together. I’ve done it in the past and it’s never fun, but I know that not dealing with the issue is going to cost everyone.
Don’t let that guy remain in your student ministry. Your students deserve better.
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